National Geographic reports that “Scientists found the small, blind crustacean last March during a deep-sea expedition some 900 miles (1,500 kilometers) south of Easter Island, which lies off the coast of Chile”.

The Kiwa Hirsuta (from Kiwa, the goddess of crustaceans in Polynesian mythology and hirsute for its hairy claws) has scientific wondering about its hairiness… Well, I guess it’s maybe cold down there. Or perhaps it’s because there is no beauty parlour in the South Pacific and it can’t get a depilation like more fashionable westernised crabs…

No kidding, there is one question that is left unanswered after a quick search: is it comestible? After all, it was discovered by French, so they must have given it a thought. Apparently, its habitat is toxic and the hair could be used to host bacteria to filter toxic minerals (or some like that), so maybe it’s too toxic to be eaten.

Anyway, it would be nice to know because there is potentially a market, using Japanese restaurants as an outlet and surfing on the momentum Japanese food has gained in the past decade. Kiwa Hirsuta can sound very Japanese, its toxicity makes it potentially very attractive (think Fugu) and it’d be looking good in the middle of a colourful sushi plate: The ultimate trendy delicacy that you can sell at the price of gold – like Parmesan*.

Anyone wanna fund my Yeti Lobster exploitation venture?

*: If I remember correctly, Parmesan is the only cheese for which price has parity with gold… I couldn’t find sources online to back this up.